Alone time, do you really need it?

Well, it is quite likely that I’ve missed the deadline for this cruise topic as I haven’t had a moment of alone time since I well, don’t know when. You know what? I don’t really miss it all that much. I’ve chosen to stay home and take care of my children because that is what brings my joy at this stage of life. I hate to say it but a lot of the time it seems to be the women that work outside of the home that wonder what we, homeschoolers, do without much a lone time. Sometimes, it seems, that more time alone breeds more of a need for time alone. I don’t have alone time and I don’t really crave it. Sure, there are moments when everything seems totally upside down and I want to run screaming from the room and lock myself alone in the bathroom (but, that wouldn’t work here anyways as the bathroom doesn’t have a lock and I would be sure to be found within moments).

I used to get a wee bit of alone time in the evenings after the children had gone to bed and at that point I would write or read or spend time with my husband. Well, with the newest addition and the fact that we practice attachment parenting I don’t really get alone time, not even when I sleep. In fact, the vast majority of the time I have a wee little being attached to me somehow. Right now, this is just a part of life and it won’t always be this way. A fellow homeschooling Mum and I try to get out every couple of months (yes, months, we are busy) with nurslings in tow for a cup of tea at a local coffee shop. Meeting up with this more experienced homeschooling Mum, even though it is infrequently, helps keeps me sane and reaffirms that I am making the best choice for my family. This leaves me feeling recharged and ready to keep at it and really that is all I need. My husband and I also try to watch a movie or have a special supper for two from time to time. Our older children are in a drama group each Monday for an hour so during that time my husband and I make a point of getting together for a cup of coffee, now with baby in tow. The silence is almost eerie as we are so used to being surrounded my curious, talkative children. I also consider Sunday church to be alone time as it takes me away from home and allows me to just be without having to be on the go with the two older children. It’s a nice time to reflect, sing, and pray and also leaves me feeling refreshed. I think much more than these outings would leave me craving more and more alone time, as opposed to being helpful.

No everyone needs lots and lots of time alone to be able to function effectively as a parent, though, that seems to be what many people think. I think that I am the best parent I can be by remaining in the thick of it and showing my children that I can still care for them while taking moments in my day to enjoy my own projects along side of them. I think that these are the moments that my children will remember when they grow up and think back on their childhood and I am happy to have been able to give them to them.

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